"I Really Love You"
I met you a few days back,
You seemed so odd to me.
There were changes in your look,
That did not appeal to me.
The hair was different, the ears had an extra piercing,
The clothes you wore seemed strange, the shoes were shimmering.
You were in tune with the others, not with me,
And I had thought, here was someone who understood me.
You asked me how it looked,
And I quietly smiled.
Not willing to hurt your feelings,
I said you looked just fine.
Your attitude was so different towards me
You seemed to shifty around me
As if I made you highly uncomfortable,
And that you did not wish to be seen around me.
You laughed in a manner that was totally fake,
You tried to stir up conversations with some intricacy.
And I tried to understand what was wrong today
Why you were hurting my soul pointedly.
What was my fault, that I was being treated thus
Were you ashamed of your "friend", as you had once said of me?
I felt embarrassed and guilty, for making you feel this way
But was it really because of me?
And I too, joined into the charade,
This game that we played in perfect harmony.
While within me, my heart wept silently
Mourning for her, her soul's demise.
But somewhere inside if me, somethings snapped
Was it respect for you, or your image in my mind that cracked?
My respect for you vaporized there itself,
As I saw you try to blend in with the new crowds,
While rejecting your old true self.
And rejecting people like our friends
Including myself.
Why did I lie to you?
Just so that I do not hurt you?
But had you not hurt yourself enough
By ignoring your true side,
In search of someone that was never you?
I thought I knew you
And I respected you for that
But now I think I was absolutely wrong
That you were never that .
That person with whom
I had fallen in love with,
And though I had not shared
What I had always felt for you.
I was glad that day
That I never said,
"truly, from the bottom of my heart
I really do love you."
You seemed so odd to me.
There were changes in your look,
That did not appeal to me.
The hair was different, the ears had an extra piercing,
The clothes you wore seemed strange, the shoes were shimmering.
You were in tune with the others, not with me,
And I had thought, here was someone who understood me.
You asked me how it looked,
And I quietly smiled.
Not willing to hurt your feelings,
I said you looked just fine.
Your attitude was so different towards me
You seemed to shifty around me
As if I made you highly uncomfortable,
And that you did not wish to be seen around me.
You laughed in a manner that was totally fake,
You tried to stir up conversations with some intricacy.
And I tried to understand what was wrong today
Why you were hurting my soul pointedly.
What was my fault, that I was being treated thus
Were you ashamed of your "friend", as you had once said of me?
I felt embarrassed and guilty, for making you feel this way
But was it really because of me?
And I too, joined into the charade,
This game that we played in perfect harmony.
While within me, my heart wept silently
Mourning for her, her soul's demise.
But somewhere inside if me, somethings snapped
Was it respect for you, or your image in my mind that cracked?
My respect for you vaporized there itself,
As I saw you try to blend in with the new crowds,
While rejecting your old true self.
And rejecting people like our friends
Including myself.
Why did I lie to you?
Just so that I do not hurt you?
But had you not hurt yourself enough
By ignoring your true side,
In search of someone that was never you?
I thought I knew you
And I respected you for that
But now I think I was absolutely wrong
That you were never that .
That person with whom
I had fallen in love with,
And though I had not shared
What I had always felt for you.
I was glad that day
That I never said,
"truly, from the bottom of my heart
I really do love you."
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